SWAW_EP181 - 3 Ways To Build Trust
[00:00:00] Welcome to start with a win, where we give you the tools and lessons you need to create business and personal success. Are you ready? Let's do this.
coming to you for Denver, Colorado home. World headquarters. It's Adam Contos, CEO of rematch with start with a win. I see producer, mark here. How you doing buddy? That's right here. I am. On the other side of this camera. I'm doing so good. Whoa, what's going on with that voice, buddy? Yeah, I, you know, I got one of those traditional things that they used to call a coal.
The back in the day, I got, I got a cold over this past weekend and it's just those residuals, you know, they just hang on forever. So, and now I got this, this sweet, a little bit of a. [00:01:00] The world only one man can survive. Are you doing that? You doing like radio commercials now? Well, actually it's funny because I noticed on the intro recording, I, you know, I kind of dug deep on that VO on that one and I kind of looking back I'm like, I think I was getting over a cold and that one too.
I'll tell you what it sounds good. You know, you, you can keep it if you want, or I don't know. It might be hard to sing with that. I'm not sure. Yeah. And it, you know, it's just like having your nose drained sucks and you know, that's, that's no fun. I don't want to keep it. I don't want to keep it. Well, we liked the temporary stand in.
Yeah. Radio voice. Exactly. Exactly. Have you been. I've been really good, you know, we're, uh, it's this March now, um, you know, a couple of months ago, I announced it I'll be retired from Remax come the end of this month. So, um, it's, it's kinda cool. A lot of warm, uh, you know, [00:02:00] conversations and, and a lot of high fives as well as a lot of well-wishing going on, but it's really cool because I'm been expanding out in the coaching and doing some public speaking, as well as, uh, helping, you know, people who've gone.
And one of the things I really like is building executive. So helping people that, uh, are, uh, have been in an MBA program or executive MBA program, you know, I went through one of those several years ago, uh, helping everybody really. Build a great leadership presence in their company, based upon the knowledge that they've gained and maybe they didn't go through an MBA program, but they just want to want to build that.
So we've been working on that a little bit, but, um, you know, overall just love the company Remax and how everybody's treating me with. Yeah, that's awesome. And, and man, Remax is on fire. I mean, if, if ever was a time to leave, it's bittersweet, right? Because in one way, they're just crushing it and it's like, man, might as well stay around for this amazing thing.
But in the, on the other hand, it's like, well, you know, there's other things you want to do. And it's a great time to, to leave on top, you know, Oh, totally. I mean, there's so much, so [00:03:00] much going on, you know, um, we've, uh, already released all of our, uh, 20, 21 numbers and things like that. And it just, it was a huge year for Remax.
Remax did over 2 million transaction size. Nobody in the world did more than two. I mean, it's never been done before. So in 2021, over 2 million transaction size. And just a banner year. So you're right. I'm leaving at the top as well as, um, something I want to talk about today, which is trust. Uh, in fact, uh, Newsweek and brand spark did a big survey of shoppers in a reveals that Remax agents are the most trusted by Americans.
Interesting. And I wonder if that has any correlation to doing the most transactions as well as being the most trusted. Hey, you never know. So, I mean, it's, it's, it was take a step back into, uh, 2020 when COVID was starting. And I was, uh, on this. Panel with some other CEO's and we all were going through data about what the consumer wants and the consumer [00:04:00] really wants in this order and heavily weighted to the front end of this.
They want trust, safety and inclusion in the companies that they do business with. So it, it was really cool to see the survey by Newsweek and brand spark and just how they went out and unpack that to determine. Who's the most trusted, because truly that makes a difference in business. It makes a difference in your life.
I mean, don't, you want to be trusted by people for crying out loud, and there are some ways to do that. So I want to unpack, uh, basically kind of three categories of how you can build trust today. What do you think? Yeah, this is, I, I think it's awesome. I mean, I think trust is it's interesting and you're probably familiar with this, right?
It's I tell my teenager kids like, Hey, trust is the one thing. You can give me and is the most valuable thing, you know, because when I trust you, I can give you more privileges. I can, uh, you know, know that you're doing the right thing when I'm not around. And so you want to make sure to hold on to that.
And even if telling the [00:05:00] truth or, you know, fessing up to something where, where, you know, you did something wrong, as long as you. That's going to be less of a punishment then, you know, if I find out that you lied and then I can't trust you because that trust is so valuable. Yeah, exactly. Oh, it's 100% correct.
I mean, we always talked about it in our house about, you know, you have a trust account and you make all these deposits with true trust bucket. We need a big bucket, says trust on the side, you just fill that bucket up. That's right. Yeah. So I mean, the reality is it's, it is a bank account or it's, it's a bucket or whatever.
And as soon as you, you empty that thing out, uh, life becomes a little more challenging, right? So we have to continue to make deposits in that trust account. And there are some ways that. And there's three ways that you've identified to build this trust three ways. And this is not my original work.
However, I've, I've been reinforcing this over, over quite a bit of time. And this is, uh, also comes back to several psychology studies and things like that. [00:06:00] And Harvard business review has done some articles on this and people have written books about trust and things like that. But the reality is, yes, it functionally can be done in, in three categories.
Category number one. Hey mark. Can you give us, can you give us a category? Number one? There we go. Awesome. All right, well this, this is kind of a no-brainer. So when you think about it, um, you know, trust. For the most part is built by building relationships. So th the category number one is you have to build positive relationships.
And I say positive relationships because we have all sorts of relationships in our lives. And those relationships can be just remote relationships. They can be, you know, sporadic, they can be. Um, it can be a relationship of distrust. So think about that people, if, if you have distrust, but I think we all have those people in our life that, you know, we would say that they're a friend, but every time we talk to them, they're gossiping or talking about [00:07:00] how terrible things are.
And it's like, man, I don't know if I'd ever share anything really personal with this person because they're, you know, every time I talk to them, they're talking about somebody else's business and it's like, yeah, we're friends, but I don't necessarily trust you. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. I mean, do you, do you trust that relationship and, and the, uh, the communication that occurs in that relationship?
And like you said, if they're talking trash about other people, when you're around, when you're not around, they're talking trash about here, right? So red flag. Yeah, exactly. There's a, and I was listening to the radio this morning and they were talking about there's yellow flags and there's red flags. And when you see somebody doing something around you.
Just know that they're doing it about you when you're not around, that's a red flag to me. So, um, you know, positive relationships and you have to look at the positive relationships that you have in the relationships that you have with others and that those others have with other. Um, when it comes to that.
So you're, you're generating this cooperation and this interaction between everybody and, um, you know, relationship is not [00:08:00] a, just a, a two-way street here. It's kind of a web of different, uh, into, you know, this intermingling relationships of all sorts of different people. And when you have really, really trustworthy friends, Those friends have really trustworthy friends.
And then you get this, this web of trust going on amongst these people, through those relationships. So that, I mean, that's, that's really key is how you build that. And here's one of the key aspects to that. Mark is how do you resolve conflict in those relationships? Do you ignore it? Do you argue about it?
Are you, uh, you know, humble about it? Do you have humility and things like that? And the reality is. We're going to have conflict in life. Right. Right. And the most trustworthy relationships will go into that conflict and say, Hey mark, I know we disagree about this and we can respectfully disagree with each other, but let's, let's [00:09:00] figure out this conflict here.
Let's, it's the tensions there. I love you, man. Let's figure this out so that we can move on with our relationship in a trustworthy. Yeah. And I think too, even when it comes to businesses, you know, I'm a huge, uh, I love Bonvoy Marriott and, you know, I got the, the rewards card, all these other kinds of things.
And I give them my business exclusively because I'm a big fan of their properties. And every time I go have a good experience, um, and this past year we were on a road trip and I, we had a terrible experience. And I, you know, when they send you that email, like, Hey, how was your stay? Uh, you know, I just, I spoke my mind a little bit, you know, and just said, Hey, I was really disappointed in this.
And, uh, amazingly, instead of them just ignoring it of, you know, thousands and thousands of people putting this in the manager of the. Of that property got back to me and then like calm, tar stay. And I was like, oh, okay. You, you, you, uh, instilled that trust again, you know, in the property and the brand, and even drove it deeper, you know, [00:10:00] where it's like, oh man, if they're going to do something like this, then I'm going to be even that much more loyal.
Oh, totally. And you know, you're going to have bad experiences, places that nothing is always perfect. 100% of the time. But the reality is you were honest with them about it. You didn't lose your mind or, you know, blow up at them or be condescending or insulting or anything like that. He just said, Hey, this, this just, wasn't what I believe your standards, what I trust your brand to deliver.
And they said, well, let's make a right. It's I I've experienced that as well. I mean, we've, um, I've experienced it in Marriotts and I'll tell you why it's again, you, you have to expect I was on the road in 2019. I was on the road like 200 days. So I've, I've got well over like a thousand or 1100 nights room nights in Marriotts.
And they, why so many Marias, because I trust their brand. I trust their hoteliers, uh, no matter where I go to deliver a certain quality [00:11:00] and not just the quality, but the caring behind it. So it's, it's a reciprocal relationship and that's a big part of, you know, having. Positive relationships is there's a reciprocal aspect where I use their business, their service, and I respect them.
And I, I have a smile on my face and I treat their employees with dignity and respect. Like I, I would treat anybody, but it's amazing. Some people don't treat others this way when it comes to that. Um, so they treat me the same. And we've had this lifelong relationship. I've given them a ton of money and they've given me a ton of room nights in hotels get experiences.
Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So, um, you know, you, you, you build trust in a brand without relationship yet with. So super important. So how about number two? All right. Number two, give me number two, mark. Number two is judgment [00:12:00] and expertise. So particularly good judgment and expert. You don't want poor judgment and poor judgment, but yeah, when people trust.
Uh, a brand, a leader, a human being they're trusting that you make decisions that are mutually in the best interest of the situation. So you're not one-sided and you're not selfish. You're not self-centered, you're not egomaniac. You're none of those things, but you have good judges. When you're making decisions that, uh, because let's face it.
And there are a lot of people that need to listen to this judgements, don't just affect you. They affect other people. They affect businesses. They affect employees. They affect your family. They affect your reputation. Which is how other people are judging. So the reality [00:13:00] is you have to use good judgment in order to create trust and sometimes good judgment means, you know, and, and just to take a little bit of a sidestep here, it does overlap with that relationship aspect.
You're not flying off the handle at. Hmm, you're taking a deep breath and you're determining what is best for this situation. And a lot of times what's best for our situation is an everybody wins outcome. So the judgment can be not, how can I take advantage of that person? And that, that situation it can be, how can we all win together?
Right. Right. And then when you've done that, You build expertise and people trust expertise. So what is expertise? Expertise is the culmination of your perspective, your opinions, your ideas based upon past experience, right? And it could be based upon education, you know, there, um, the heart doctor did a heart surgery for the first time at [00:14:00] some time.
Right. Okay. And they probably had somebody else there that had done many, many, many before. That was an expert on it, but there's a transference of expertise that goes on in life and people trust it when you seek that expertise by seeking experience, by seeking knowledge. And the reality is a lot of times that expertise and knowledge comes from, um, bad judgment.
Every now. Right. Yeah. It falling and then picking yourself back up and dusting yourself off and moving forward and not letting it set you back. And then, you know, I think this goes back to, you know, one of your, your big, you know, you're a big proponent of making videos. And so I think it's that idea, right.
Of gaining that knowledge and then putting a video out there so that, uh, your sphere of influence can see that. And, and. No, that you're actually working on yourself that you're, you know, putting in work and effort, you're learning new things and you're sharing that knowledge with people because then I think again, right, that comes back to that building trust [00:15:00] aspect where they see you doing what you said is important, and then there may be learning from you.
And then that is kind of instilling that, filling up that bank account of trust. Like, oh, look at this person gave me some valuable information on their YouTube channel or their social media page. And that, you know, maybe even subconsciously is, is building that. That trust, uh, with you, even though they don't know that that's happening, huge point mark.
And let me, let me frame that by saying, what do people do when they don't know the answer to something. And ultimately when they don't know the answer to something, they have, there's a fear response. There's an unknown that's going on. And I'm not saying they're afraid of, you know, saying something, doing something, whatever, but they question whether or not that's the way they should do it.
Do they have the confidence, things like that? Yeah, they researched. And being in big Google, they go to Yahoo and [00:16:00] type it in that's right. Or the being as being the dog? No beings. Microsoft search engines. Oh, is there like a little icon? I don't know. I've never been to anything in my life. I'm sorry. There was, I don't know.
I thought it was like big and then it was like Lycos. Remember that one? Yep like us. And, uh, there was, yeah, there, I remember the dog, when you're talking about from back in the day, the search engine, there was one called like Spyder search or something like that too. It was like, uh, I think we just lost everybody.
Like, what are you guys talking about? We're talking about search engines from like the nineties and early two thousands before you could just search and Google things. Hang on. Let me pull up my pager and check and see if anybody's that's right. My TiVo or TIVA, Madam trail, my trail. Hang on. I've got to write this down in my Palm pilot.
Yeah. All right. So let's all right, come on, everybody back in the bus. Um, so we're, we're talking about trust here. The first thing that we talked about was relationships. The second thing was just judgment and expertise. So, [00:17:00] you know, your, your quality of making decisions of solving problems, the speed to do that.
And, um, you know, do you learn from those things you, you humble during those processes? So people look for that judgment and expertise. The third component, the third component of trust. Thank you. That was perfect. All right. This is, what's pretty simple. And, but this is also a problem that a lot of people have is consistency.
Hmm. Oh, preach, preach. Oh, yes. So, uh, I mean really? What, what creates success in life? What builds trust in life? What, what builds a bank account for crying out loud consistently? Yeah. So if you think about the trust account that we talked about earlier in this show, um, if you make deposits in that trust account all the time, every single day, maybe you, you pick up the phone and call somebody every single day, just to say, mark, how you doing?
We're great friends. I just wanna check in on you just do that to somebody different every single day. And you'll be like, wow, I just built this massive network of trustworthy people that have [00:18:00] great relationships with me. And, but it's consistent and role models, leaders. Um, you know, if you're an executive in a company, one of the key aspects that your employees seek out is consistency.
Why? Because they know what you expect from them. And they know what to do in the company. There's clarity and consistency. So that clarity and consistency creates trust. That's a really important part of this. If you do something different every day, nobody's going to trust you for anything, because they're not going to know what to expect for.
And then the other part of this is consistently honoring your commitments and promises. It's like being on time for something. And let's say, I mean, when, one of the things, um, my, my crew at Remax, like if I have a, I have a video shoot or something like that, uh, I do a lot of teleprompter reads of sending out videos, announcing things you mentioned we're on video a lot.
The reality is I'm always a few minutes early to those videos. [00:19:00] And I was like two minutes late one day and they're like, what's going on? You're always here on time. I'm like, I just, you know, I missed it. I'm sorry I hit this other, whatever. It was no excuses. They're like, okay, that's cool. So, um, but they got concerned.
They didn't, they didn't like distrust me over the whole thing. They were concerned because it was not how I normally do it. Same thing with your health, same thing with your relationships. And I know you do this, you have a great relationship with your family. Do you tell them so many times a day, you love them?
Do you spend dedicated time with them? Do you do get rid of the electronics, spend your attention with them? Things like that. Uh, I mean you even go camping in the woods, road tracks, all sorts of stuff. Yeah. You got you. You're a great dad. Thanks Adam. You're welcome, mark. So, um, you know, it's, it's following through on these commitments and, and focusing.
Here's the, here's the other thing being willing to go above and [00:20:00] beyond for people give them more than they expect consistently. And that massively builds trust in a relationship in a, in a business setting, things like that. And everybody says under promise over deliver. We'll just promise and deliver how's that exactly?
Let's start there. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So give your brand promise and stick to it. What is the brand promise of mark? What does the brand promise of Adam? What does the brand promise of listening? And think about that. So that's, I mean, that's the takeaway that I want everybody to go away from this podcast with is sit down and say, what is my brand promise?
Do I do it consistently? Do I work on my relationships and do I exercise good judgment and expertise in this? And that's awesome. Yeah. And I think, you know, these three simple. Ways to build trust or something that will also build your business that will build your network. [00:21:00] Um, you know, I look at, uh, you know, I've been in business with brand Viva now for six years.
Um, and I started off with nothing, you know? Um, and then here I am six years later and you know, businesses been great and, uh, and I. At, uh, how I've grown my network and it has just been doing these three, three things, you know, I've grown relationship by being trustworthy and consistent. And then that person then refers me to somebody else.
And it just has grown organically like that over the past year or so. Um, so for anyone who's looking at, how do I grow my business or get more contacts? Well, start by building a trust. That's where. Thanks for being on today. Everybody, we appreciate you. Mark has some closing words to say in that amazing voice.
If you're ready to create personal and business success, make sure to subscribe to this podcast and head over to wherever you get your books. Start with a [00:22:00] win the book for more great content. You can go to start with the wind.com and until next time star with a wind .